Not even sunrise, Wednesday morning

[heroic_jawline]

Steve was an obnoxiously perky morning person, even when (like tonight. He'd fallen into a Wikipedia hole) he hadn't slept for more than a few hours.

He stretched his legs out at the bottom of one of the endless sets of stairs in Fandom, singing (badly) under his breath: "First to fight for the right, and to build the nation's might...and the Army goes rolling along--"

He grinned over at his partner. "Ready?"

[OOC: For the guy who can fly so he doesn't have to run, probably, but open to anyone else up at an ungodly time to run!]

Comments

[heroic_jawline]

"We're close pals," Steve amended. "How did it break? Peggy shot at me point blank and it just left small marks."

[imafuturist]

"Loki, the Odin-Force," Tony replied, shamelessly licking powdered sugar off his thumb. Because food. "Shattered it. We got it fixed in Wakanda, but it took a little while."

Also, could Odin be more pretentious? Odin-Force. Christ.

[heroic_jawline]

"Odin-Force?" Steve repeated, making a face. "He named it after himself?"

[imafuturist]

Odin did fluctuate between 'cool dad' who would embarrass you in public and cruel, calculating god who once pimped out his kid to build a wall.

Because mythology was hilarious like that.

"Right? If I ever think I'm being too dramatic, I just remember that." And keep being dramatic. Damn it, Tony.

[heroic_jawline]

Steve snickered. "Well, you do have a massive, ugly building in Midtown with your name on it which is plenty dramatic," he teased.

[imafuturist]

"Hey, that's expected!" Just ask all the other billionaires.

[heroic_jawline]

"I don't know anyone else with their name on a building," Steve said.

[imafuturist]

"You know two people with their names on a building." They just happened to both be the same person.

[heroic_jawline]

"I know two yous with their name on a building," Steve said, "so I'm thinking this might be limited to you and that guy running for president."

[imafuturist]

"Wow, comparing me to corporate Hitler. That hurts."

If Trump won, he really would turn super villain.

[heroic_jawline]

"Think if I socked ol' Donald on the jaw I'd get a lecture or a medal of commendation?" Steve asked. "I found some interesting web pages. I've been educating them on how World War II really worked."

He'd been starting internet flamewars, Tony.

[imafuturist]

Which probably meant JARVIS was busy trying to hide the IP address to keep things from coming back to the shop. He worried like that.

"Probably both," Tony replied dryly. "Oh god, did you find Neo-Nazi sites?"

[heroic_jawline]

"Yeah," Steve said. "They're just so wrong."

And on the internet! They are wrong on the internet, Tony.

[imafuturist]

"Yes they are," Tony assured him. "And anyone with a brain knows it. Just promise me to not read the comment section on any website."

The genie was already out of the bottle, Tony.

[heroic_jawline]

"Too late," Steve said, wincing. "It's also too late to tell me about SafeSearch on Google before looking myself up."

[imafuturist]

"Damn it, JARVIS." Worst net nanny ever. It probably didn't help that he measured levels of internet wrong with Tony. "If you start sending me cat memes, I'm going to be both proud and frightened."

A beat.

"Oh god, send them to SHIELD."

TONY NO.

[heroic_jawline]

Steve smirked. "Too late. Hill isn't that amused by a cat playing a piano. Natasha sent back a guinea pig with a pancake on its head."

[imafuturist]

"I don't think Hill has any sense of humor," Tony replied with a sigh. "And you've completely ruined the Black Widow's mystique there."

He'd always picture that guinea pig now. Instead of being a little scared and into it.

[heroic_jawline]

"Then she sent me a Buzzfeed list of '27 Ways the Black Widow Could Kill You Using Just This Desk Drawer' and added twenty more," Steve added.

[imafuturist]

"I'm almost surprised there aren't more," Tony said. "So you and Ms. Romanoff, huh?"

And he had to say it with a terrible Russian accent too.

[heroic_jawline]

Steve's ears went red. "No, nothing like that. I think we're friends. Kind of."

[imafuturist]

Consider it Tony's revenge for the morning.

"Friends are good," Tony granted him, grinning with pride. "You not sure?"

[heroic_jawline]

"Well, it's Natasha," Steve said with a little shrug. "She's never really playing it straight, is she?"

[imafuturist]

"Point." And she wasn't even a double agent with HYDRA in Steve's universe! "Clint knows her best. At least where I'm from they were partners."

A beat.

"Of course, that's why he ended up in prison..."

[heroic_jawline]

"Clint went to prison?" Steve gaped.